| You Might Be a Redneck! |
| What's the last thing you usually hear before a redneck dies? 'Hey y'all... Watch this!' How To Pick Up A Chick In Arkansas: Hey Baby! Nice tooth. You Might Be A Redneck If... You think the last three words of the national anthem is 'start your engines.' You Might Be A Redneck If... Fifth grade was the best six years of your life. You Might Be A Redneck If... One of your kids was born on a pool table. You Might Be A Redneck If... If you refer to the fifth grade as, "your senior year". You Might Be A Redneck If... You think the stock market has fence around it. You know yer a redneck when you take a load to the dump and bring back more than you took. You Might Be A Redneck If... You've ever been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog. You Might Be A Redneck If... Your grandfather died and left everything to his widow... but she can't touch it 'til she's fourteen. You Might Be A Redneck If... The figurines on top your wedding cake were wearing overalls. You Might Be A Redneck If... Your favorite restaurant has a sawdust floor You Might Be A Redneck If... You've ever burped and killed a fly You Might Be A Redneck If... There were dogs in the church on your wedding day You Might Be A Redneck If... You're saving up to gravel your driveway. You Might Be A Redneck If... You've ever bought a used cap. You Might Be A Redneck If... You turn the sprinkler on and tell the kids it's a water park. You Might Be A Redneck If... You've ever had to have a wrecker pull your car out of a pothole in your driveway. You Might Be A Redneck If... Your wedding cake was made by Sarah Lee You Might Be A Redneck If... You've ever had a dream about beef jerky. You Might Be A Redneck If... Winn-Dixie catered your wedding. You Might Be A Redneck If... Your not actually able to read the Richard Petty Story, but you sure like to look at the pictures. You Might Be A Redneck If... You've ever tried to pass an entire funeral procession. You Might Be A Redneck If... Your driving a vehicle with no original body parts. You Might Be A Redneck If... In preparation for a romantic evening, you stop by the grocery store for a bottle of Mr. Bubble. You Might Be A Redneck If... The fireworks stand gives you a volume discount. |
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Redneck Etiquette
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